Instant Time Travel!
Distill Six Decades Of Life Experience Into A Three Minute Package
Now you can get all the benefits of an older (58 years old as of 2/2015) gentleman living alone in central Michigan without actually putting in the effort.
You Can Lose Wait Easily With Our Program
Experience a sedentary lifestyle (in part due to disability from severe arthritis and in part due to congenital laziness) in the comfort of your home with the simple press of a button. Surprise your friends by sharing life lessons, insights, and warnings as if you were a conservative retired divorcee (with 35 years of marriage experience) having spent nearly four decades working in dozens of careers.
But Wait! There’s More…
By clicking on the FOLLOW button, you can receive ongoing benefits of regular doses of
- Comic Relief
- Practical History
- DIY Pointers
- Financial Insights
- Abnormal Profundity when you least expect it
All in a single package with our all-new “EAZY OPEN” packaging.
BONUS: Three Things Your Parents Didn’t Want You To Know!
Since the express purpose of this program is:
- Encourage You To Laugh
- Allow You To Learn
- Enable You To “Like”
You have the power to guide where we go and what we see along the way. Just add comments (no water necessary) and watch the site grow!
I Shouldn’t Be Telling You This, But…
An element of disclosure: my real name is Dale. Phred is my gaming name and my alter ego (in case I reach “super hero” status anytime soon).